SENDS 4 Dad is a community group in Northamptonshire offering activities and sessions for men caring for a child with a disability or special educational need.
Created 11 years ago, membership has grown since the COVID-19 pandemic. The group was founded by Paul Meadows, a carer who went through a period of mental ill-health after his son was diagnosed with autism, ADHD and Dyspraxia, and he found that there wasn’t much recognition or support for male carers. SENDS 4 Dad is an opportunity for dads to help each other through the challenges of caring.
There is a social group for male carers at a local pub, Happy Hub sessions at the FrankBruno Foundation with opportunities to exercise and socialise, a breakfast social at a café that supports people with autism into employment, wellbeing activities for parents, family sessions at an activity centre with a sensory garden, activities for dads such as archery and pistol shooting, a drop-in session attended by local services, and a Brew-tiful Bromance group.
This year there is a new dad and child youth club, and SENDS 4 DAD are also a community partner for Everyone Active, which offers monthly swimming sessions. Some of the fathers help run the groups, and one has started his own daytime drop-in session for parents not in employment. A local youth club association is also supporting the dads to devise and run their own sessions.
Paul has found it helpful not to label the groups as ‘support groups’ as sometimes this can be a barrier if people don’t want to admit they are struggling, or don’t realise that they need more support. Offering social activities creates a more informal environment.
The groups help to reduce isolation: some of the men who attend are single parents, some have experienced mental health issues, and several feel excluded from conversations with support services who sometimes assume the mother is the main carer. Paul feels that fathers are more likely to talk openly about challenges in groups attended by other men.
With thanks to Paul and Carers UK for sharing this story.